Turning One.

You know its coming from the moment they are born. You count them in days then weeks. Then when it sounds to funny to say "oh he's 13 weeks old," you switch to months. Moms are proud to announce the youngest of answers, of course, because what mommy is not proud of their new arrival. Then, as the months go by, it becomes a different kind of proud. It becomes "oh he's 6 months....look what he can do." As the number climbs, a mother treds on the time tightrope. She enjoys, no... savors, every new move, every new reason for a giggle. But, trying not to blink, for fear that they are growing fastly before her very eyes, she anticipates the big one, literally, the big 1.


Yes it is here. My little Luca bear. My little newborn who desperately wanted his thumb that he enjoyed while in my belly. My little sleeping so good baby. My little screamer at every middle of the night change. My little thumb-is-my-best-friend boy. My little crawler, who was so proud to finally follow his brother. My cruiser, who finally annoyed his brother. My nurser, attched to me literally for twelve months, twirling my hair, touching my face. My smiling, funny, walker. My snuggler, my bear-bear, my boy. Luca is 1.

How did it happen? Oh...it happened. I have 12 months of no sleep, not including the lovely loss of sleep of pregnancy, to prove it. I have double the amount of kid wash to fold and put away. I have sore boobs...and completely GET OVER the fact that I have included this. I have a messy, "how did it get stuck over here" food to clean up after every meal. I have a packed to gills diaper bag, every time I leave the house, which by the way, always takes forever to do. I have an added passenger in the car for every drive, that I have to tend to. I have an ALWAYS interuppted workout (the gym guy knows my name). Oh, and I have a lovely bit of "i had a baby" weight to work on.

But....none of that really matters. You see, because when you have a little man, as I do, you GET to do those things, well lets leave the weight part out of it. But you do. I got to stay awake for the past twelve months, nursing, studying his face, stroking his hair. I got to take care of the clothes that kept my baby warm and watch as the sizes increased, which in his case, was quite often! I have been completely blessed to be with him for every meal. See his funny faces at the first taste of peas, and his enthusiasm while eating every cookie. I got to clean up after a baby I call my own. I get to rarely be alone. I always have my two little companions. It takes some preparing for sure, but they are my company. And well, working out will come, maybe just not in this season of my life.




I have had the privelage to be Luca's mamma. As tiring and as messy as it has been, I wouldn't trade anything in this entire world for the days I have had with my baby boy. How did it happen? I don't know. I look back and its 365 days of memories, precious pictures in my mind, that are, now, a flash in time. I miss them, I loved them and I look forward to many more. I love you little Luca buca bear.